Midlife? What's that mean exactly?.....

So, this week for some crazy reason I have been EMOTIONAL. Typing at my computer, tears just start falling. Anything can set this off. Just typing this, I am tearing up. What is wrong with me?

I may have gotten a clue what is wrong last night at a class.

Background info - last week I dragged out some old cassette tapes I had of the kids from 1993, 1994, 1995 and 1997. Listened and really enjoyed hearing their sweet voices and fun singing we used to do.

To continue with my story, last night there were some small children in the store. One of them sounded so very like Jordan when she was 4 and 5. I almost started crying right then and there!

Then it dawned on me. Perhaps this trip down memory lane was the preciptiating factor for my crying spells.

So, next step. Get a grip chickie! Don't just sit around and be morose and weepy, take action! Enjoy what is, don't obsess with what used to be. Be happy it happened, but don't get caught up in the past. Look to the future. So, maybe by taking my own advice I will get this emotional hurricane under control!

What's going on here.....

Not too much going on. Kids are back in school officially as of Aug 16th.


We went to a party







Jordan is thinking of a new hair cut that would be short.



There was a microburst in Liberty





Then drove out Saturday morning to see this crazy thing:



I helped out at a scrap event in Liberty. Cool hat!



Then I got together with some other crazy scrappers to create.



Lookie what I made! It is a wall hanging for my craft room.

Blog challenge - birthday gift

From Shawn: Name something you have recieved for a birthday gift. Can be something you like/dislike. Tell us about it. What you thought when you opened the package.

If you've ever turned 40 and thought it totally STUNK, I know the feeling. BUT thanks to my wonderful family I will always remember my 40th birthday with much happiness and warm mushy feelings. I didn't even put any makeup on that day, just felt blah. Finally in the afternoon it was card, cake and present time. I was reminicsing about the previous day when I WAS IN MY 30's!!!!

The prospect of the cake was pretty nice. I picked chocolate of course. And with my gourmet cook husband I knew that would be a treat.

Then, the big present. "Star Trek the Movies" Complete DVD collection - all special 2-disk sets. WOWSERS. I was totally floored! Of course it was something I really wanted, but I was not expecting itat all! It was probably one of the best birthday presents ever! So, that is why I enjoyed turning 40!

My favorite Shawshank Redemption quote

"I find I'm so excited, I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it's the excitement only a free man can feel, a free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain. I hope I can make it across the border. I hope to see my friend, and shake his hand. I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams. I hope. "

I cry EVERY time.

Blog Challenge from Maricar

From Maricar. .....Having friends is such a blessing. People to trust. People to talk to. People to shop with. People to crop with. People to enjoy. People to love. People to need.

Think about your friends - those dear to you for years and years, those you have recently met whom you know you treasure.

Without naming any names and without the need to tell stories, list TEN characteristics you desire a friend to have. Of course, not one friend may have all ten characteristics, but you are just making a list of ten things that might draw you into a friendship and keep you in that friendship. It's kind of like an "ideal" list.

Then, list TEN characteristics about YOU that make you a good friend.

Ten Friendly Traits:

1. Loves a good joke, has a great sense of humor, laughs at the drop of a hat.
2. Cries at romatic movies.
3. Dreams about making the world better
4. Can keep a secret
5. Clean or messy, but content with her choice
6. Active
7. Accepting of my failures (even when I have no makeup)
8. Encouraging my aspirations (even when they sound totally crazy)
9. Follows the school rule - "No put downs"
10. Thinks my husband / boyfriend is perfect for me, but not her type

What makes me a good friend? This is such a touchy subject with me. I am so jealous of anyone who has had friends since school. I have had it said about me "She is a friend to everyone". But just like the old saying, "jack of all trades, master of none", being a friend to everyone, means you really aren't CLOSE friends with anyone. We moved so frequently I just couldn't keep those school friendships going. I tried to reconnect a couple of times with school friends and it just never worked out. Maybe it is all for the best. I have made some wonderful friends in the last 10 years since I have stayed in one place for awhile. (I SOLEMNLY SWEAR TO NEVER MOVE AGAIN!) I feel like some of my friends of the past 10 years are almost like sisters to me. They have probably seen me at my stupidest but still love me. So, now that I am all weepy eyed again, I will try to list 10 things about me that make me a good friend, but I have REAL doubts about this.

1. Loyal.
2. Laughable, meaning I have a sense of humor, even about myself!
3. Optimistic ( or just plain foolish? )
4. Supportive of your crazy ideas.
5. Willing to lend a hand, just ask. (cause I am too slow to figure out what you need help with on my own)
6. Can take bad news and cry alongside you.
7. Believes in you.
8. I don't get mad.
9. But for you, I will get even.
10. I like good clean (and cheap) fun. So, I'm cheap (but not easy).

(JT says that I actually AM easy, but hey that's another story).

Why Castaway?

Why have I been watching Castaway over and over the past few weeks? I have probably watched it at least once or twice a week for the past couple of months. This is probably the best speech from the movie.

Chuck Noland: We both had done the math. Kelly added it all up and... knew she had to let me go. I added it up, and knew that I had... lost her. 'cause I was never gonna get off that island. I was gonna die there, totally alone. I was gonna get sick, or get injured or something. The only choice I had, the only thing I could control was when, and how, and where it was going to happen. So... I made a rope and I went up to the summit, to hang myself. I had to test it, you know? Of course. You know me. And the weight of the log, snapped the limb of the tree, so I-I - , I couldn't even kill myself the way I wanted to. I had power over nothing. And that's when this feeling came over me like a warm blanket.

I knew, somehow, that I had to stay alive. Somehow. I had to keep breathing. Even though there was no reason to hope. And all my logic said that I would never see this place again. So that's what I did. I stayed alive. I kept breathing. And one day my logic was proven all wrong because the tide came in, and gave me a sail. And now, here I am. I'm back. In Memphis, talking to you. I have ice in my glass... And I've lost her all over again.

I'm so sad that I don't have Kelly. But I'm so grateful that she was with me on that island. And I know what I have to do now. I've gotta keep breathing. Because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?

From Melissa by way of Sara, all kinds of STUFF about me that you wanted to (?) know.

This is at any time in your entire life:

( ) Smoked a cigarette
(X) Drank so much you threw up
(X) Crashed a friend's car
(X) Stolen a car (took my boyfriend's car keys cause I was mad that he fell asleep and took off with his car. I was 15. No license. Went speeding down Noland Rd at 70 mph, and lived to tell.
(X) Been in love
(X) In love now
( ) Been dumped (I dumped 'em before they could dump me!)
(X)Been laid off/fired
(X) Quit your job
(X) Been in a fist fight
(X) Snuck out of your parent's house
(X) Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
( ) Been arrested
( ) Gone on a blind date
( ) Lied to a friend. Unfortunately I have a BLUNT temperament. Talk too much.
(X) Skipped school
( ) Seen someone die
(X) Been to Canada
( ) Been to Mexico
(X) Been on a plane
( ) Been on a cruise ship
(X) Been on a train
( ) Been lost
(X)Been on the opposite side of the country
(X) Gone to Washington, DC
(X) Swam in the ocean
( ) Felt like dying
( ) Cried yourself to sleep. No I can't sleep while crying. I have to make sure I cry ENOUGH! Then I can sleep.
(X) Played cops and robbers
(X) Sang karaoke
(X) Paid for a meal with only coins
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't
(X) Made prank phone calls
(X) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
(X) Danced in the rain
( ) Written a letter to Santa Claus
(X) Been kissed under the mistletoe
(X) Watched the sun rise with someone you care about
(X) Blown bubbles
( ) Mud wrestled
(X) Been "Skinny Dipping" with a member of the opposite sex
( ) Made a bonfire on the beach
(X) Crashed a party
(X) Gone roller-skating
(X) Ice-skating

Any nicknames? Netski or Netter
Mother's name? LaVonne
Father's name? James
Any siblings? Beatrice
Any children? Jordan and Steven
Any grandchildren? No
What is your favorite drink? Mountain Dew
Body piercing? No
Tattoos? No
How much do you love your job? BORED STIFF
Favorite vacation spot? TIE - Rocky Mountain Natl Park and the Ocean
Ever been to Africa? No
Ever steal any traffic signs? Yes, once when I was a senior in high school.
Ever been in a car accident? Yes
2 Doors or 4 Doors? 2
Salad dressing? Thousand Island
Favorite pie? Hot Dutch apple, a la mode.
Favorite number? 7:11 (I was born at 7:11 am)
Favorite color? Green
Favorite movie? Today it is Castaway. (it changes every day)
Favorite holiday? Christmas
Favorite food? Peanut M&M's. Does that count as food?
Favorite day of the week? SATURDAY
Favorite brand of body soap? Olay
Favorite TV show? Star Trek, TOS or TNG
Favorite smells? Lilac, freshly mown hay fields.
What do you do to relax? walk, read, watch a movie
Kind of car you drive? 2001 Ford Escort
Favorite car if you could have it? 1973 Mustang Hardtop
How do you see yourself in 10 years? Retired early, or if not, taking more road trips with the kids out of college.
What do you enjoy receiving? Jewelry, gift certificates.
Farthest place you will send this message?As far as human eye can see
What time is it now? 4:43 p.m.

School begins again

Back to school once again. Fireball is resigned to being back in his basket instead of hanging with Jordy all day. He insists however that the basket be on the piano bench or my desktop, certainly NOT on the floor. Well, I don't blame him a bit. I wouldn't want to be relegated to the floor.

Took the requisite pictures on the stairs of the kids. Jordy is at the high school and Steve at the Jr. High. They share the same French teacher. That should be interesting once she figures it out! Jordy was giving Steve the low-down on some of his teachers. You know, you HEAR things about teachers. And, you want to help a brother out, right?

Dad T. has his surgery on Monday. I am taking a few hours off, hopefully to keep Mom T. company. We are a bit anxious about it, but I am sure nothing like they are feeling.

After re-reading "The Hiding Place" last week, I wish I could learn to trust like the Ten Boom family. What an amazing belief and trust they had. Plus such a perfect way of looking at serving humanity, not just self-serving. Well, I admit, Corrie was more like me, tending to rationalize bad behavior instead of just admitting I'm wrong and stopping it. If you are reading this, take a few minutes to check the book out from the library and see what you think. Here's a link if you are not familiar with the story:

http://www.corrietenboom.com/history.htm

All of a sudden the birds seem so active! Why is that? Is it because it was a slight bit cooler?

Blog challenge - tomorrow last day on earth

From Sara: If you knew tomorrow was your last day on earth, what would you do with the time you have left? (And yes, guys, I know you would spend time with your family..)

This was extremely hard for me. I have been thinking about it for a week or so. I am such a planner/organizer, it is hard to think of a last day without a lot of time to plan. Tomorrow by golly comes quite quickly. Individual days are short. It is the accumulation of days in life that add up to something meaningful. So, I decided finally that rather than hop a jet out to Colorado or something like that I would do these things.

First I would get out my video camera and lots of video tapes. My plan is to make a documentary about this day. I will have my kids help me out with the video to make it more fun.

Next, I will rent a U-Haul. A very, very big U-haul. I will load up all my useless accumulations of "stuff" that the family doesn't need/want. I will arrange to get this all to a charity or two.

As the video rolls I will talk about life, my views on religion, politics, science and space, the future of mankind, etc...

Next, I will spend some time playing cards with the family with my Star Trek videos going in the background.

Next, in the late afternoon, I would stop by church and just sit quietly for awhile with the family.
After a nice dinner, I would look at all my beloved books and recall the wonderful stories and eye-opening reading I have had the opportunity to experience.

Since there are no mountains or big waterfalls around here, I would spend the last evening hours by the Missouri River, just listening to the wildlife, birds and the water swirling past me, taking a last opportunity to remember the life that was a gift.